Feeding and Nutrition
1. What does diet have to do with anything?
Diet rich in fibre and diverse in nutrients shape and balance the gut to optimise brain function resulting in overall well-being. The gut-brain connection is often referred to as the “gut-brain axis”. Home to trillions of microbiota, these micro-organisms play an essential role in digestion, immune function and neurotransmission.
The gut produces neurotransmitters such as GABA, glutamate and dopamine which are known to influence mood and learning. It also influences the immune system and its responses which can affect the brain. Chronic inflammation to the gut has been linked to conditions like depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder and more. Research is ongoing to understand the intricacies of the gut-brain axis, particularly in developmental conditions such as autism spectrum disorder (ASD) and attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD).
2. My child is a picky eater...just like me. Is that a problem?
While picky eating is a common phase that many children go through, it still presents challenges for caregivers. Problems associated with picky eating include:
• Mealtime stress
Parents often worry about their child’s eating habits and power struggles at the table can occur, creating stress and unhappiness in both parties.
• Limited food choices
Picky eaters tend to have limited food preferences and may strongly resist trying new or unfamiliar foods.
• Nutritional concerns
They may not receive a balanced diet which can lead to concerns about sufficient intake of fibre, vitamins and minerals.
• Food wastage
Refusal to eat food prepared at mealtimes can lead to increased food costs and frustration over wastage.
• Impact on family dynamics
Family members may have to adapt to the child’s eating habits which can disrupt mealtime dynamics, especially at extended family events.
• Social implications
The impact on the child’s social life is felt more keenly at parties and gatherings when they reject foods that are unfamiliar. This can lead to embarrassment or feeling left out.
• Future eating habits
If not addressed appropriately, picky eating can lead to long-term food aversions, malnourishment and unwillingness to try new food in adulthood, which has a greater social impact then.
Managing picky eating with patience and understanding while encouraging exposure to new foods in a non-coercive manner is key. One way to encourage picky eaters to become more adventurous and balanced eaters is to involve them in playful meal preparation.
3. What is the difference between picky eaters and problem feeders?
Picky eating and problem feeding are two different levels of selective eating. Picky eaters eat select foods based on texture, taste, presentation and even colour. Problem feeders have a more extreme form of selective eating where they may consume less than twenty items. This may persist into adulthood. Such aversions to specific textures or smells make mealtimes challenging and puts the individual at risk of nutritional deficiencies and other health conditions. Hence, it is important to discern the severity of feeding difficulty and seek professional guidance early.
Academics
1. What are access arrangements or accommodations?
An accommodation is an adjustment (to a task) that reduces the difficulty presented by a learning disability. Similarly, access arrangements allow a student to access the curriculum in a different manner. Both terms are used interchangeably. While there is no limit to the range of accommodations, the main objective(s) of the assignment or examination should not be changed; the content remains the same though the method of accessing it can be modified.
As more students with learning difficulties (i.e. IQ is average or above average but with specific learning issues) are educated in mainstream classrooms, these students have to be assessed the same way as students without difficulties.
The following is a list of common accommodations or access arrangements:
• Extra time during examinations; typically extra 15 minutes per hour of the paper
• Separate room for examinations
• Students may take exams individually or in a small group
• Typing instead of writing answers
• A prompter to read aloud exam instructions or specific parts of the exam
• Enlarged font on examination scripts
• Single-sided printing on examination scripts
• Mini breaks during examinations
2. Bilingualism - one language, two languages or three?
Children learning two or more languages may need more time before learning to speak. However, much research has shown that bilingualism improves long term problem-solving skills, understanding of one’s culture, a better sense of community and self-esteem.
Generally, the earlier you expose your child to a different language, the easier it is to pick up.
Exposure can be offered based on:
• Setting
Speaking one language at home and another at school, community events or social functions such as visits to relatives
• Day of the week
Different languages on alternate days or one language in the first half or of the week and another in the latter half
• Time of day
English in the mornings and Mother Tongue in the evenings
• Speaker
Mum speaks English while Dad speaks in their Mother Tongue. Do note that this method takes time for the flow of family conversations and social interaction to become natural. So, some patience is needed.
Try the different methods and decide which is most comfortable for your family and lifestyle. Whichever you choose, it is important to be consistent and use one language at a time rather than mixing them in one sentence. It is acceptable when children mix languages as they learn to speak but it makes it challenging to learn if they have to process different languages within a sentence or conversation.
Speak slowly, start simply and build up gradually. This means that if your child is at the 1-2 word level, you can speak at a 2-3 word level and so on. Using long sentences when your child is speaking at the word level makes it hard for the child to understand and learn effectively.
If your child has a language delay or learning difficulty, it might be better to teach one language initially until understanding and speaking abilities are stable. At the end of the day, learning is lifelong. There is no research to show that learning a new language in adulthood results in poorer understanding or limited speaking ability.
3. Emotional Quotient (EQ) Vs Intelligence Quotient (IQ)
Emotional Quotient (EQ) is a person’s ability to perceive, understand, manage and express their emotions and take other’s perspectives.
These include skills that use:
• Self-awareness: identifying and understanding our own emotions
• Self-regulation: managing and controlling our emotions
• Social awareness: being attuned to the emotions of others
• Relationship management: navigating social interactions effectively with emotional awareness
EQ is necessary to build relationships, effective communication, conflict resolution and leadership. It leads to improved interpersonal skills that help us lead harmonious personal and professional lives.
Intelligence Quotient (IQ) is a measure of cognitive intelligence that focuses on problem solving skills, logical reasoning, pattern recognition and general knowledge. These are assessed through standardised tests and used to predict academic and intellectual capabilities.
Although EQ and IQ serve different purposes, a person can possess both high EQ and IQ; a balance of both is ideal. For example, someone with high IQ might excel in technical fields that demand methodical thinking while someone with high EQ might excel in leadership roles that require strong interpersonal skills. Both intelligences are valuable attributes that enhance overall success and well-being in different areas of life.
Behaviour Management
1. How can I manage unexpected behaviours?
Effective praising provides specific, authentic and timely feedback to acknowledge someone’s efforts, accomplishments or positive behaviours. The process is praised rather than just the outcome. This encourages a growth mindset and intrinsic motivation that foster resilience and perseverance in the face of challenges. Genuine praise helps develop positive self-image and confidence that leads to increased self-esteem.
Effective praising reinforces positive behaviours that engages prosocial actions such as helping others and cooperating with peers. This in turn leads to positive feedback that builds trust and strengthens relationships with teachers, parents as well as peers. This promotes a supportive learning environment for both academic achievement and socio- emotional well-being.
Some recommendations for good books on behaviour management include:
• Boundaries with Kids by Drs Henry Cloud and John Townsend
• Discipline without Distress by Judy Arnall
• Hate Me Now, Thank me Later by Dr Robin Berman
Social Skills
1. Where do social skills start and end?
Social skills are wide ranging abilities for interacting and building relationships with others. It starts with basic skills like making eye contact and being polite with appropriate language to more complex ones like active listening, empathy and conflict resolution.
Social skills are refined throughout a person’s life. There is no specific end point as long as we keep interacting with people personally and professionally. Advanced social skills include networking, negotiation, leadership abilities and showing cultural sensitivity. We need to keep updating our social skills because communication and interaction methods will continue to evolve with technological and societal advances.
2. Which social skills are essential for every teenager?
Social skills are necessary for teens to build and sustain relationships and achieve personal and academic success. They also promote mental and emotional well-being.
Vital social skills include:
• Communication
Effective communication involves both listening and speaking. Learning to express oneself clearly and respectfully while being attentive when others are speaking is crucial for conveying thoughts, emotions and ideas.
• Active listening
Fully engaging in a conversation, showing interest and asking appropriate questions build rapport, trust and understanding with peers.
• Empathy
The ability to take others’ perspectives and share their feelings foster deeper connections.
• Conflict resolution
Conflicts are a natural part of social interactions. Teens should learn to resolve disagreements without resorting to aggression and hostility. Being able to compromise, find common ground and maintain respect during conflicts can be learned.
• Problem-solve
Effective problem-solving involves critical thinking, creativity and making informed decisions to cope with life’s challenges.
• Respect
Treating others with kindness, courtesy and recognising their boundaries means acknowledging diverse perspectives, being considerate of cultural, personal and physical differences.
• Teamwork
Teamwork is crucial in academic, extracurricular and professional settings. Hence, learning to collaborate with peers, delegate tasks and contribute effectively to group projects is as important as valuing others’ contributions.
• Time management
Balancing school, extracurricular activities and a social life requires good time management. Teens need to learn to optimise their time by setting and prioritising goals while creating schedules independently.
• Self-confidence
Building self-confidence and self-assurance motivate teens to believe in their abilities and pursue their goals. They are also more likely to be adaptable, engage in social interactions and take on new challenges when they are confident.
• Digital etiquette
Screen time and social media are introduced earlier in schools via online learning. Being responsible and respectful online includes protecting personal information, being aware of and avoiding cyberbullying. Developing these skills help teens manage social situations and sustain healthy relationships.
Teaching and practising these skills can help teenagers navigate adolescence and prepare for the challenges of adulthood as useful members of society.